One Of THOSE Days
Have you ever had one of those days when everything you touched fell apart?
On a recent shopping trip, I stopped into Walmart™ to pick up a wall clock for my home workshop. The clocks were neatly stacked in a pyramid shaped display. While I was looking at the clocks, I brushed against one of the lower ones and that’s when the avalanche started! An elderly woman walking by stopped and looked at me. Without smiling she said, “Time flies” and continued on her way. I figured, considering her age, she must know.
After putting back the fallen clocks I headed towards the checkout. On my way I passed a display of basketballs. In my youth, or at least in my mind, I was once a great and talented basketball player, a legend of the neighborhood asphalt courts in New Jersey where I grew up. I stopped to feel the leather of the balls and recall my glory days. That’s when the avalanche started. I got out of there quick. As penance, I made a donation to some stupid children’s charity at the cash register.
On my way home I stopped in the AutoZone™ to pick up a new headlight for my truck. I decided to try the new “ultra-bright” headlights and I bought a pair so that they would match. I only needed one so I figured I could save my remaining good headlight as a backup in case I ever needed it. As I removed the good headlight from its socket it slipped, although more accurately it seemed to jump, from my apparently cursed hand. It bounced off the truck’s grille “bink”, hit the fender “boop”, and then hit the ground “BANG”. That was the end of my backup headlight.
Well, I figured I’d had enough shopping for one day and headed home. My wife was away on business, and I thought I’d surprise her by dusting her collection of porcelain humming birds…